gutless shining

suck me in again hoping worthlessly for air
and suffocate on my shoulder a tear
i grab and knarl and hate you for always
as if i can't find it in myself
the love all destroyed by this
and watching the feet move slowly out
and falling unto the ground and bleeding
and tasting the red betrayal
i suffered a loss within you
and someone else grasp unto your heart
waiting hopelessly for our shining
but throwing every nerve out
of pain which i can curse again
and wait for the fist to strike me hard
into my face now a waste
and a brain useless
just waiting for a dying
if love is you and life is you
then death is me for all of you
with your foul cries in through my sharpened claws
around a neck i once licked
and craved adn bit
for love inscribed with blood
i turn and chew and spin away from here
into your final trying
into the way we once were
then again
i can always hold you and watch my heart
fall into your waste
defecating the trials of the love
and the love of the betrayal
i grasp on watching the wheel spin me over
and losing again
as i've always had
blindly waiting for a touch
of your hand
leading me closer and closer to the edge

-winston campbell-